Too good to be true

“Wow, Matt…that sounds amazing, but it also sounds too good to be true.”

Anyone ever said that to you before?

I’ve heard it a few times over the past month as my organization, SafeWorld seeks to finalize some major plans for 2012. Reality is, it’s the biggest venture we’ve ever embarked on, and I believe will be a game-changer.

Closer to the end of the year, we’ll begin revealing what’s next, so stay tuned, but that’s not what this post is about.

I’ve had lots of “too good to be true” moments in my life. They’re painful…even debilitating depending on when they hit the fan.

“Too good to be true” (or TGTBT) moments happen when our imaginations hijack our logic, lock it in the back room of our minds and keep it there just long enough for us to make an ill-advised decision.

Now, I’m not giving imagination a bad rap…imagination is one of the most vital parts of us.

But imagination is simply evidence of all the hard work we do in our heads. Hustle, sweat, tears, late nights, callouses…those are the evidences of all the hard work we’re doing in real life.

There’s a chasmic difference between the two, bridged by focus.

In correspondence to his younger brother, Mark Twain wrote: “The bane of Americans is overwork–and the ruin of any work is a divided interest. Concentrate-concentrate. One thing at a time.”

Imagination is your biggest fan, and also the biggest exaggerator of your abilities and progress, so while it must be protected, it must also be kept in check. (Just as imagination is there to keep our logic in check, and make sure we’re not giving into resistance.)

TGTBT situations have caused me to fall flat on my face and overlook the needs of my wife and children before. Not because I didn’t care, but because I leapt before it was time to leap…I over promised and under-delivered…I didn’t seek wisdom from people who knew more than I did (or I ignored the wisdom they gave)…

You’ve been given a gift that people desperately need, and your imagination is there to help you kill dragons, keep your ability to dream alive, and protect child-like faith. Imagination births excitement and anticipation…I’ve never heard anyone’s heart race as they logically thought about a process…it doesn’t happen.

The best part of hearing that phrase, “Wow, Matt…that sounds amazing, but it also sounds too good to be true”, is that I get to respond with this:

“No, it’s not…I’ve worked too hard…I’ve spent too much time making sure all the loose ends are tied up…the details are in place…and we’re all on the same page for it to be too good to be true.”

Red flags get raised for me when I ask someone about their plans, then they point to their heads and say something like, “Oh, don’t worry…I’ve got it all up here.” That’s nice…but I’m 100% convinced it’ll look different as it translates from “up there” to real life…and that’s ok, just be ready, and don’t give up.

As you push forward with your plans, just make sure the work being done in your head is also being done in real life. Trust me, if it’s a dream worth doing…it’s worth the hustle it takes to do well.

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“The function of the imagination is not to make strange things settled, so much as to make settled things strange.” // GK Chesterton

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Have you ever had a job, opportunity or relationship that ended up being too good to be true?

Don’t interrupt me

It was all planned out.

My morning. My day. Every hour had been properly labeled. I even left the house a little early to give myself some cushion.

I walked into the coffee shop where I love to write…

…and was promptly interrupted. Usually I can order my coffee with an extra shot of espresso, pop open my MacBook Pro and stuff my headphones in my hears so fast that no one dares approach.

But not today.

There he was, blocking the start of my day, an old friend with much to share. (Which he did…at length). It felt like the scene fro Monty Python and the Holy Grail when Sir Lencelot tries to cross the Bridge of Death, but must first answer three questions.

My plan was ruined.

How dare he. Didn’t he know I only had an hour to hustle on a project before my first meeting started? Didn’t he know my son had a doctor’s appointment? Didn’t he know my schedule for the day didn’t have any wiggle room?

No. Of course he didn’t.

For the first half of the conversation, I was looking for a way out. (Ever been there?) I was done before he even began.

Then…he shared a story. (Which wasn’t short, and had several subplots).

The story was about how a few days ago, his life had also been interrupted. It was about how he didn’t want to deal with it. He figured if he just ignored it, the situation might go away. It didn’t. It stayed until he finally understood and embraced his role in it.

For this old friend, he thought the people in the situation would just end up using him…instead…he was used by God because he didn’t abandon the interruption.

And there it was.

The reality is, while we slave over our calendars and intricate schemes, many times God is waiting for us in the interruptions…in the margins.

A couple thoughts:

1. Don’t use interruptions as an excuse to be lazy
2. Don’t leave an interruption until you understand your role in it.

We’re highly trained to brush people off…to the point where even our own children sometimes have to call for us 3 or 4 times before we answer. Deep down I convince myself it’s because I’m focused, but really it’s because I’m selfish.

Remember this…

People are always more important than plans.

People are always more important than hustle.

People are always more important than projects.

People are always more important than politics.

People are always more important than theology.

People are always more important than my ego.

Embrace interruptions. Rarely are they a waste of time…in fact, you never know when an interruption might just change everything.

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And…to my dear friend this morning…thank you for interrupting me.

Plaid shirts and Rob Bell glasses

I saw a shampoo commercial the other day.

In fact, hair product companies have been recycling this particular schtick for years: they take an expensive salon-grade product and use it side by side with their more budget-priced product to show you don’t have to spend a lot of money in order for your hair to look like you did.

The entire 60-second spot hinges on the big question: “Can you tell which hair was treated by the expensive product?”

If they can convince you that their stuff works pretty much equal to the other stuff…they’ve succeeded.

Blending in works for shampoo companies…but it NEVER bodes well for leadership.

If people have to wonder who is in charge, there’s a problem.

Your leadership should be wearing an orange reflective vest, not camouflage. We don’t need more leaders that blend in. There’s already a line miles long for people who want to do that.

When I say blend in, I’m not talking about getting a bunch of leaders (or aspiring leaders) together and they all happen to be wearing North Face soft shells, plaid shirts and Rob Bell glasses.

When I say blend in, I don’t mean you have to stand out to everyone, just the people you’re called to lead.

I’m talking about being too conversational and never decisional…

I’m talking about delegating so much responsibility that people wonder what’s left for you to do…

I’m talking about saying all the right words but not doing them…

I’m talking about lots of hype and not enough hustle…

Leadership is more like being a crossing guard than a hunter. Our job is to help people move from one place to another. If that’s not happening…we aren’t leading.

Here are 4 simple things to help prevent a leadership wardrobe malfunction:

1. Don’t be a jerk

Just because you have the microphone / job title doesn’t mean you get to treat people however you want. Burn enough bridges and soon enough you’ll find yourself leading on an island. Alone.

2. Leadership is a privilege, not a right

Be prepared to work harder than ever because no one is going to just hand it to you. Entitlement kills vision. You don’t have any control over how long God has entrusted your particular role to you, but you do have control over how committed you are to getting the work done while you’re in it.

3. When you’re done learning…you’re done

Wendell Berry wrote: “It is not from ourselves that we learn to be better than we are.” Don’t ever stop growing, learning, listening to people around you. Sometimes that’s another leader who’s farther down the road, but sometimes our greatest teachers are right where we are; the closer they are to us, the easier to overlook.

4. Keep your ego in check

If I ever start to get too big for my britches, all I have to do is walk in the front door of my home. My wife and kids are the best antidote for my ego. Not because they put me down, but because they remind me of who I really am in the grand scheme. You need people around you who aren’t afraid to do that for you as well.

It takes time to grow into your calling. Don’t force it. Discovering your identity helps determine your effectiveness.

Don’t blend in, lead well.